♬ One little, two
little, three little dinosaurs ♬! No this ain’t a
Jurassic Park promotion, it’s a popular song for babies. Yeah yeah, these are
the kinda songs that keep springing up in my head, been more than two years
now. There’s no room for Arijit Singh or Yoyo Honey Singh, or even the Ed Sheerans
of the world.
Toddler On Board ….
As I sat at the airport,
filling the immigration forms, I was humming this song even without realizing
it. Using both hands in ways I never knew I could, and keeping an eye on one
whole human while still writing on paper, these are some of the skills I
discovered I had, after I entered the motherhood phase.
I’ve travelled with a baby all alone, I’ve travelled with a baby bump all alone. But traveling alone with a toddler. And one who’s crossed the stage where he would sit around like a saint or, hop around you with wobbly feet - a whole new experience, my friend.
Fasten Your Seat Belts ….
So for all fellow mommies, and to be mommies, here are some tips that
shall come handy. Daddies go ahead, bookmark the post too. I so do know though
that most of you wont ever need it, you lucky monsters.
- You are a Goddess, with Dashbhuja (ten arms). Feel it from within. Keep telling yourself. It will just make the whole adventure a little simpler. If nothing, at least psychologically.
- If exercising is your thing, go all out on your weights training. Once the baby evolves into a toddler, he has his own bag. Mind you ‘his own’ only means that it belongs to him. It does not mean that he shall drag it around. It would be more like Saari duniya ka boj hum uthaate hain feeling for you.
- Wear comfy clothes. Helps in all the chasing at the airport. Especially when you’ve achieved a difficult feat of holding bags, while completing formalities, while still answering questions. And your toddler takes fancy to something. Could be another kid, or bird, or just a plain rod!
- More importantly, wear a smile. Comes in handy when the little fella decides to topple a glass or a handbag, or maybe a person. The only route of escape for you is a thousand watt smile.
- If you are the shy types, now’s the time to open up. He shall barge into unchartered territories, leaving you with no choice but to make small talk with any and every stranger. And if the stranger turns out to be a mind numbing and lackluster bore, all I can say is good luck!
- If your toddler is like mine, seizing every opportunity to grab a gadget when on land, but surprisingly shunning them 30000 feet above sea level, practicing the art of sleeping with open eyes is not a very bad idea.
- Yes, he has a ticket now, a fully paid independent seat. Does that mean he shall stay confined within those boundaries? My heart weeps for you if you think so.
- “Don’t you play with those Passports!” “No fidgeting with that pen.” “No, you can’t play in that cramped filthy toilet.” Even before he embarks upon an incredible sentence, use those two magical alphabets N O.
- Got games, toys, and books handy? Don’t bother. For a curious little fella, wanting to quickly move from one quest to the next, identify real-life full-blown entertainers beforehand. Could be an airhostess, the ‘alelelele’ aunty or the story-telling grandpa in the front row.
- If you are toilet training, do not don the Jhasi ki Rani hat and take him diaperless. A fellow passenger ran with supersonic speed leaving all her bags unattended, when her little one decided to sound off the alarm. The devil in me peeped out with her horns, and smiled at what a smart decision I had made. You need something to pep you up yaar!
Phew ….
After such a mind-blowing experience, pick up the pieces of you that
remain and alight at the only airports in the world that treat you like Royalty,
our very own Indian airports.
I looked at the helper boys like a child would look at candy. ‘Chahiye utna paise le lo bhaiya, mujhe mukti
de do.’ Do you think I lost my mind after the rollercoaster journey? Nope,
sanity prevailed. I said that in my head.
PS. After a
sleepless night, followed by a busy tiring day, here I am, making this
checklist for humankind. At least ek smile toh banti hai!
33 comments:
Very useful tips here. A good post.
haha!!! Leena! You made me laugh with this one, smart Mom:)
Rolling with laughter! I am so grateful that phase for me is over! Happy new year to you and your family Leena.
Ek nahi, at least dus smiles toh banti hai :) :)
As usual, a very good write-up!
Oh !! Maam... u write so very well...
i am highly impressed.
love..
lol. very useful tip. love your humor, Leena. :)
Enjoyed, even though I'm not a mother —I have vaguely experienced it as a father of twins.
Hahaha, your funny punches make your experience and tips lighter, but I can imagine it must have been a hell of a ride with the little one (even the unborn one).
Awesome post! Though may not have this experience any time soon now,enjoyed your guidelines for an interesting future!!!
Awesome post! Though may not have this experience any time soon now,enjoyed your guidelines for an interesting future!!!
Hahaha.. Cant stop laughing on Jhasi ki Rani !!!
Thanks Jamshed!
Thank you Vishal buddy! Glad I could tickle your funny bone :)
Happy New Year to you and your family too Sujata! Every phase is a learning experience :)
Thank you Anonymous :) :)
Made my day....
Shraddha dear, thank you very much...lots of love.
Thanks Meera..
Glad you liked it Uma! Warm welcome to my blog :)
You hit the nail on the head Alok :)
You can always ping me in the future too Amrita for my handbook :)
Thanks Sapana dear, glad u liked it :)
Haha mukti de do :D You are a humour queen! Reading this post itself makes me tired. I can imagine the hungama! :)
I think i have read this post earlier.
Anyways i too wave both my hands to welcome you back....
lets rock it again !!
very useful tips Leena :-)
Useful tips ...
http://thetalesofatraveler.com/2016/01/23/packing-winter-ladakh/
These tips will be useful for mothers.
Tips are very useful Leena ji . Thank God My wife do not here to read it otherwise she will ask to go with me for every journey . Haha . Just kidding . Great useful post indeed.
Thank you so much Miss Rangelz, you made my day :-)
Yep I posted it on social media a bit later Shraddha dear, thats how you've read it twice :-)
Thanks Archana dear!
Thanks swati and sam, and welcome to my humble abode :-)
I hope so Rajesh :-)
Hehe, then I need to send a link to your wife Yogiji ;-)
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