10 Tips For Traveling With A Toddler

♬ One little, two little, three little dinosaurs ♬! No this ain’t a Jurassic Park promotion, it’s a popular song for babies. Yeah yeah, these are the kinda songs that keep springing up in my head, been more than two years now. There’s no room for Arijit Singh or Yoyo Honey Singh, or even the Ed Sheerans of the world.

Toddler On Board ….

As I sat at the airport, filling the immigration forms, I was humming this song even without realizing it. Using both hands in ways I never knew I could, and keeping an eye on one whole human while still writing on paper, these are some of the skills I discovered I had, after I entered the motherhood phase.

Hai Dhuaan Hai Dhuaan .......

This is a public apology letter, long due. Better late than never! A humble attempt to say ‘Pardon me’, to various sections of the society.

The Occasion? Christening of Delhi as a Gas Chamber.

The Need? Silly desire to breathe fresh air (other Metro Cities aren’t lagging far behind).

The Convict? Apparently all the elderly, all the infants, all of those with a chronic lung condition or with heart problems.

The Magnanimous Forgivers? The below mentioned Samaritans.

Image Credit: cliparts.co

Daadi Amma Maan Jao!

Do you remember this classic number? Trust me people, blessed are those who have not one but two sets of parents, pampering and supervising, overseeing and looking after them, every step of the way. The second set of course being doting grandparents. I'm one of those lucky grandkids who had the fortune of having her Aaji (grandma) around till she was well above 80, and Ajoba (grandpa) till he turned 89.

You know there's a local saying, that if your children are milk, grandchildren are the cream on the top. And believe it or not, but that's how the Aaji-Ajoba treat their grandkids. We were completely spoilt and sheltered by them. Of course, the strict dad ensured that the laad-pyaar didn't get into our heads.

To My Dearly Beloved....

Okay, so that’s a deceiving title. I’ll explain. I’ve (my blog has) been given a Liebster Award. If you look up the meaning for ‘Liebster’, the answers that you shall get are - beloved, dearest, sweetheart. But this meaning has got nothing to do with my post, apologies.

Liebster Awards are given by bloggers to other brethren. You get it and pass on the torch to ten other bloggers.

The questionnaires that float around the blogosphere with the Liebster, remind me of slam books we used to fill up in schools. Ah, fun times. I thought I'd up the fun factor and make a twisted questionnaire. Hope I don’t get frowns and curses for this one, instead of the thankyou note I’m supposed to be receiving. (If you do throw a shoe my way, please ensure it’s a pair.)

Life's A Messi Motor!

WHO ………….

When it comes to exhibiting power, no other title in the world can match this one. The power to change moods, the power to change the tones of a tea party, the power to play mind-games. Hell yeah! The MiL. For the ignorant men, that means the classic Mother in Law.

You can love her, you can hate her, but you just cannot ignore her. It all begins from day one. They tell you, you are embarking on a new journey, not just with the guy, but the whole family, blah blah. They could cut the crap, and keep it simple. ‘You are entering the MiL space, good luck with that!’

Pamper With Pampers!

It’s funny how we call our babies little bundles of joy. Cos they aren’t as little as you naive souls might think. By naïve souls I mean that part of human race, which is miles away from motherhood, or even the preggy ladies for that matter.

Let me explain. My little bundle of joy made an arrival on the life scene two years ago. Boundless Joy - check. Over Excitement – check. Infinite Love – check. Overly Protective Attitude – check. Underlying Fear – check. Surprised with the last one? Until the D-day my friends, it’s all hunky dory. Getting indulged from all directions. Apart from the special care at home, strangers do their bit too. Seats being given up, ways being cleared, a helping hand being offered. We get spoilt and misled. And then, the moment of truth. Its nature’s way of telling you, sarcastically, ‘Abhi toh party shuru hui hai!’

M's For (nothing but) MOM!

You are surfing (read googling), jumping windows, reading up, writing down, sipping tea. Scroll, scroll, scroll, like, like, like and dhan te nan, it pops up, that one notification! Dreaded by some teenagers, scorned by a few others, and simply causing some eye rolling for daughters like me who are way past their adolescence.

‘You have a friend request from Mamma.’ Feelings? I'd be lying to you if I said I was jumping with joy. It was much more. I felt a sense of pride. Why, you shall know.

Rewind, Edit & Play!

Have you ever given this a thought? What if you had this unbelievable super-power, the option of rewinding your life and editing one unwanted portion?

I see many female hands going up in unison. The demand being SRK. Yes SRK has changed the way romance is perceived and love is defined. And yes, ‘Dilwale’s’ snippets have refreshed memories. I’ve come across so many statuses lately, of females drooling over SRK and how he’s killed romance for them forever. Reason - nothing can come close to DDLJ and KKHH. Agreed. But it’s the Rahuls and the Rajs we all are in love with dearies. In real life, we need to check with Gauri Khan if it’s really worth it.

Date Night

As she sat on the sofa, sipping her green tea, she kept looking at the watch again and again. It didn’t seem to tick any faster. She was looking forward to tonight. It had been a long time since they’d spent a cosy evening together. His work tours had increased lately. This time around, he had looked into her eyes and promised some good memories after he got back. One of them was a movie date night today.

Would You Drink Your Own Sweat ??

       

      Scenario A: Mother and son
“Don’t let it spill! Careful! Let the sweat drip directly into that bucket.”

“Mom, I’m trying my best!”

“I know, I know, but I have so many chores to finish around the house yet.”

Scenario B: Mother and daughter

“Didn’t you take a bath just two days back?”

“Mom, I have to go to a party today.”

“Sweetheart, I’ll give you my best perfume, and no one will know a thing!”

-    

Image source: Wikimedia, Nitin C

Sassy Sindiapore!

A little bit of India in Singapore, that’s Sindiapore. And no its not actually a bit, it’s a huge 9k count!

When on far-off shores, the heart looks for comfort, the soul searches like-minded people who share a smiliar culture and roots, to feel at home. Communities like Sindiapore have been instrumental in getting Indians together in foreign land. The popular FB group has been in existence for many years.

Are You Judgemental?

What if I started talking about Anu Agarwal? You’d go back to checking out other NewsFeed. No news about her is breaking news. She came, gave a hit, did a couple of crappy films, and vanished. She might be hooked /single, working/piling on, for all you care.

Selected as a top post on Blogadda!

Calendar, Khana Do!

You float and float in a dream world, until all the helium is exhausted and you hit the ground with a loud thud….. Aaaaaaaa…… Congratulations to the newly wedded couple. That’s where it all begins ;-).

I had this absolutely over-the-top amusing notion that I would never cook in my life. And then? I got married!

Ganpati Bappa Morya, in Singapore!

You read that right! I had the privilege of screaming Ganpati Bappa Morya right here in the garden city we call Singapore :-).

Come August, and every Indian starts looking forward to the upcoming months of festivities. By the time you are done celebrating one, next one’s lined up. Being away from India therefore in the festive period breaks your heart. The ache begins right from Raksha Bandhan and goes on till Diwali.

Bappa all set for Aarti!

Gaana Aaye Ya Na Aaye!

♬ Pau-bhaji, Patties, Samosa ♬ … Did you think this was the sequel to Afghan Jalebi? Nope, those are not the lyrics of any new age song! That was the menu, which we gobbled up and got set for a night of music masti magic.

So okay, what does an Election Day mean to you? Other than the ardent desire for a change, a revolution, an awakening, it signifies something very big. Don't be shy to admit it, it's a Holiday! Totally! Each one of us deserves family time and doesn't get a lot of it, so days like these provide perfect opportunities for happy long weekends.

Time To Parent Your Parent

Where do I begin? I didn’t know until last morning that this would be my subject matter of discussion. A small emergency in your family, and it’s as if somebody wakes you up from deep slumber.

Yes slumber. Cos that’s the state you are in if something’s right in front of you, but you’ve been too occupied to realise it.

BOND 003

A younger brother, a first cousin and a second cousin. I’ve been blessed with three such brothers whose ears I can squeeze when needbe. Those are the 003 I’m referring to. The occasion – every Indian knows that. ‘Behna ne bhai ki kalaai pe …..’

It’s been a while since I’ve done some emotional blabbering, so today’s your lucky day ;-). Not exactly emotional, but I’m surely in the mood for some sort of an abstract rant. The end result, you get another peek into my not so unusual life!

That Time Of The Month!

When he came home from work that night, she was seated at the dining table. In her front, lay a bowl with 4 scoops of icecream in it.

HE: When I said I was going to be late, I only meant by a couple of hours, not days you know :-)

He expected an acknowledgement of his comic timing, and some playful banter. ‘You are simply too good, I love your sense of humour jaan,’ and a hug.

SHE: You think that’s funny? I almost forgot, you are a very funny man, aren’t you?

Girls Like To Swing

Beti - May I come in Maa? I shall be doing your makeup for the day.

Maa - Where is my girl?

Beti - Oh her daughter-in-law has kept her busy. Ma’am had been promised a sedan by her DIL’s father. And to her horror, an Alto showed up at the door.

Knock Knock..Porn There?

- A 12 year old boy was crying cos his website wouldn’t load.

- Embassies were flooded with dejected lost souls looking for an abode where their needs are understood.

- There was a long procession; miserable men (masked if married) were holding placards ‘Give Me Some Sunshine’.
- Psychiatrists' clinics were overflowing with depressed desperate guys. Men who've grown up practically living off the virtual world to realise their fantasies. Men who are shaken and their lives are stirred.

And The Affair Began!

Ok stop thinking dirty! I’m sorry to disappoint you, if you’ve clicked on the post thinking you’re in for some juicy gossip. This one is a neat and clean affair, one I have started with the city which I’ve made home currently.

WhatsApping!

A whatsapp chat between Him and Her …….

She: Such a tiring day its been!

He: Hmm

The Bintan Holiday - Part 2

So here they are, a few more details about Bintan and Banyan! The follow up post to A Long Due Family Holiday - Bintan - Part 1.

After alighting from the ferry at Bintan island in Indonesia, it took us around 15 min to reach Lagoi, the area which boasts of the manicured resorts. The rustic Bintan, with the local touch is further away and houses some resorts as well. We were stationed at Banyan Tree, and our train didn’t really take many stops :-). Simply put, we hardly ventured out after we checked in!

A Long Due Family Holiday - Bintan - Part 1

Okay, so when you are gonna take a holiday with a toddler, even the planning stage, believe it or not, takes a whole lot of your time and efforts. We planned and planned, prepared ourselves mentally for the stress around our toddler’s eating sleeping and entertainment, settled on a destination, zeroed down on a hotel, decided the dates, and guess what! Weather in Bali had different plans. 

The Bollywood Quiz

I had in my The Dil Maange More Sequel! post mentioned that I would be coming up with something interesting in my next post. Due to some pressing issues that had to be dealt with in subsequent posts, this one got a bit delayed, but I assure you it's worth the wait :).

While I was writing on the sequel, I was reminded of a game a couple of our lovely friends had treated us to, a few years ago. Back in those days, when we were Londoners. A had actually gone all out and had come up with this 'dhaasu' (if you let me use the word :)) quiz. And his wife M had done her bit, by helping (or as some of you may call it, cheating ;-)) me with one or two answers here and there. It was girls versus the boys. The yelling and the screaming, the excitement and the arguments, oh my god! I can't stop smiling even as I write about it. It was a nail biting game right till the very end, with the girls team losing by one point, ufff..

The Hubby's Birthday.....

As he drove home that night, he wondered if she was indeed giving him a silent punishment for having mocked her on her 7 births' funda and her driving skills (Refer Till Death Do Us Part...A 7 Births' Contract). Scene two, dominating mother-in-law’s arrival. Scene three, mother-in-law on his bed, in his bedroom, apparently in need of some emotional flushing. Until the mother-in-law’s psychiatrist had spoken of it, his humble soul knew only flushing of one kind, the one that cleaned the toilet. Scene three had begun some 3 weeks back and didn’t seem to have a last dialogue. He wanted to shout out loud, ‘Cut!’

I'm With Gokhale

A dashing personality, a selfless attitude, a brave heart and strong patriotic feelings. Are these traits enough to qualify as a policeman in India? No they are not. These need to be unfortunately accompanied by having no aspirations for a better lifestyle, no dreams for the children's future and absolutely no concern for your own life. Why should it be this way? Just because a man loves his country and is ready to even sacrifice his life for it, does it mean he cannot wish good things for himself and his family?

The Dil Maange More Sequel!

'Pehli baar koi ladki hamare car ke front seat pe baithi hai.'

'Aap purush hi nahi mahapurush hain!'

'Bade bade shehron mein aisi chhoti chhoti baatein hoti rehti hain Senorita.'

You do know what I'm talking about, of course you do. Especially if you've grown up on the 90s and late 80s Hindi movies. You know that the above is not a conversation, but famous lines from movies of that era :-)

One of my earlier posts Dil Maange More! warranted a sequel ;-). Our childhood entertainment discussion is so not complete without the some classy and mostly nonsensical list of movies we relished then. 

Pink Lips

What lengths should we really go to for cosmetic upliftment, is that a very tough question today? In the olden days, the answer was very easy. Have you lost your mind, my great grandmom and grandmom would've asked me in return. When it came to my mom's generation, it was about being well presentable, that is it. Forget about plastic surgery being on anybody's radar, it would've on the other hand been totally unimaginable back then.

A Scorpio Hillary or a Leo Obama?

You read that right. An international news website has performed a data analysis on the zodiac signs of world leaders. Now, hold on. Why would they do something like that you ask? Just why does any other person with a social media presence look for subjects to ponder upon and talk about. That's your answer, right there. So anyway, as it turns out, the zodiac sign which seems to be ruling the world is Scorpio followed closely by Leo and then Sagittarius.

Dil Maange More!

Really, no exaggeration!

Byomkesh Bakshi, the new Bollywood movie I was told is worth a watch. It's a few weeks old isn't it, or is that months? Well, thats how much clued in I am currently to be honest! The last time I visited a movie theatre was in London, like 2.5 years ago. A movie who's climax had driven me nuts. Though my brain had been hinting at what could be the suspense, my heart had refused to accept that plausible explanation even after the director slammed me in the face with it. A ghost causing accidents in an Aamir Khan movie, it took me a few minutes to digest that story even after stepping out of the theatre! 

Enough about AK having let me down, it's an old story. Let me get to the point. So all that this movie (BB) did for me was remind me of a certain tv serial which went by the same title in those good old days of Doordarshan. The pre-cable era, the golden era filled with quality tv stuff. Tenali Rama, Kille ka Rahasya, Chitrahaar, Fauji, Indradhanush, Flop Show, Karamchand, Malgudi Days... I could go on and on. I know it's unfair to those series whom I haven't named, there are so many more worth mentioning.

Apologies, Ms.Gadkar

Where do I begin? Maybe congratulate you first? For whatever it is that you were celebrating that night. It must've been really huge, coz you chose to drink whisky instead of your regular beer. Only a fool would not want to gulp down his success with a drink which would numb his senses. And it would take a bigger fool to not desire taking control of an SUV on the roads of a city such as Mumbai, in a zombied passed out state.
Damn that nap (which you claim you took) on Marine Drive, which wasn't effective enough to sober down the effects of the whisky, who cares if the intake was three times above the permissible limit! Let's move on, shall we.

Saari night, Besharmi ki height

The literal translation of that is height of shamelessness all night. It's an apt title for this post plus a tribute from me to the new genre of inspiring and jaw-dropping lyrics in Hindi cinema. Okay, why target the poor lyricist. Producing utterly mind-numbing songs must require an altogether different level of slogging of the butt, nah? Nah ;-)

Back to the post. Before you start getting (naughty) ideas in your head with respect to the post title, let me hurriedly clarify that I'm referring to a night filled with fun. Stop right there! Fun yes, but the other kind. Where you let your hair lose over a game of cards, with a group of people, some of whom you might have just met but who become your buddies by the end of the game. Poker buddies. And the use of the word shameless was intentional, coz only shameless bluffing can get you through a game such as poker.

Till Death Do Us Part.. A 7 Births' Contract

"Fast," she said.

"I cannot possibly drive any faster. Anyway, do you remember the equation involving speed distance and time?" he asked.

"Ummmm.."

"Come on now. You got to know this one at least," he sincerely begged.

"Doesn't matter. Why do you have to keep quizzing me?! You're not my teacher for God's sake," she snapped. "You listen to me. This fast I was talking about.."

Cannot Stress It Enough

This subject may be boring for some of you but do read it nonetheless. If it helps in making even a minor change, I shall be glad.

Over the last couple of months, life has been pretty stressful for me. I hear a lot many of you saying 'ditto'. If not recently, you might have experienced it in the past, a one-time thing for some, and a never ending saga for some others. One thing's for sure, nobody's untouched.

Life and lifestyle have changed drastically over the last decade for all of us. Advanced technology, globalisation, free exchange of data and information, have created dramatic effects. New opportunities opened up, people moved up a notch in financial status. One can see innumerable advantages, but there's no denying that this is also having an impact on our health, directly or indirectly. Career problems, relationship problems, family problems. Reasons may vary, personal, professional, but it's there. All around us. Stress.

My Superhero

Is it really that simple? Moving on? No it's absolutely not. Friends and wellwishers suggest/advise; they try to cheer you up. But if the one who's abandoned you, is your loving caring and doting father, life leaves a permanent scar on your heart and a gap that nobody can fill. If it was just one person, it would've been easier (probably). But how does one mourn the loss of a friend, guide, motivator, teacher, parent, all rolled into one?

One of the few people in the world who shower you with their unconditional and incessant love, fathers. The ones behind the scenes, overseeing every act of yours since you were born, and guiding you through every step of the way. They endure hardships, struggles but keep you protected and unaware all along. They're always there, just like shadows, the unsung heroes. 

Nepal Disaster..Let's Try To Make Amends

Over the last one week, one of the biggest headlines across the world has been the earthquake in Nepal. Media has been promptly reporting day in and day out. Lives lost, lives saved. Lives changed. Forever. 

For those who have been affected, directly or otherwise, it's a page of their life they will have a hard time turning over. It's difficult even trying to imagine what it would be like to be in such a person's shoes. My hands sweat with the notion.

For those of us who've been fortunate enough to be a distant spectator, it's a passing thought. We think about the victims and their families when we see the visuals, read the reports. And that's that. It ends there. The next moment we get back into our daily grind. And no one is to blame. That is what is expected of every human being who wants to live. 

But this time around, please ponder.

Be BindASS, Don't Sharma

In a nation filled with Bollywood lovers and cricket fanatics, is it possible that a relationship which gives a flavour of both, not be discussed?

After a long long time, a cricketer-actress relationship came to the fore over the last few months. Azharuddin-Sangeeta story is very old. Nor was it in the limelight anyway. In this case, the people involved are big superstars in their respective fields. Plus they keep making public appearances together all the time. Very difficult to not take notice, and almost impossible to avoid discussions (gossip) on the subject.

Juvenile...Even Years After He's Fertile?

The juvenile laws in india are under scrutiny. Finally. Long overdue, wasn't it? The dictionary defines juvenile as 'not fully grown or developed' or 'someone who hasn't reached sexual maturity'. By any stretch of imagination, would you say that an 16-17 year old in today's times fits this definition? Don't bother to answer that question, it's rhetorical. 

For God's sake, the boy is capable of producing millions of sperms on a daily basis around the age of 13! So basically he attains manhood much before the law thinks he's become an adult. And many of these boys, with unrestricted access to the Internet, do and explore as much, if not more, than an 18 year old. You know what I mean.

You Are My Chicken Fry ....

In modern cities, people get together to grill and leave huge balls of fumes in the air, as they chat and drink endlessly, gossiping about jobs and the hardships of the developed world. But I'm absolutely not referring to such barbecues or making you privy to an endless rant about half or fully grilled pieces of chicken. The subject matter on my mind today is the very infamous AIB Roast. It's never too late to bitch/talk about anything, is it. As a writer, who expresses opinions in public, it is very natural I talk about something where the world was divided on where the line be drawn in expressing.

It would be silly of me to start explaining what I'm talking about, mentioning names etc. I don't think there's any netizen (an Indian one at least) who's not aware of the fiasco in question. But for the benefit of those who tuned in late, here it goes. Ace filmmaker Karan Johar joined hands with the over-the-top Ranveer Singh and the trying-too-hard Arjun Kapoor. And together with the AIB gang, they roasted and roasted, until the chicken got burnt and inedible for most Indians. 

The Idea of Roasting ....

Roast is a concept imported from the West, like most other innovative ideas originating in the creative minds of our country (let me not get into roasting!) The idea is to honour a celebrity with outright sleazy cheap jokes and insults. The language is abusive and vulgar. Well, the concept which is a hit in the West, was very widely condemned and criticised in India.

To See or Not to See ....

Now now, raise your hands who among us had a hearty laugh at the Roast videos. Ok, maybe not all of us. Next question, raise your hands who all increased the YouTube traffic to get a glimpse of what really transpired. Oh come on, most of us, I know. I was one of those who added to the millions of hits on the video, while my toddler peacefully slept, blissfully ignorant of that kind of language in his life to date.

I am a woman, and a woman hailing from a decent background with decent family and friends. Most importantly  a mother. Yet, I watched the videos. And inspite of the big gasps, and cries I made during the show, the thought of raising my voice for a ban on the show didn't cross my mind. 

Such content is to be viewed at discretion and is to be strictly kept out of the reach of children, 100%. But banned, really? How does it matter whether what was on display was liked by me or not? There are thousand such visual products, shows, movies et all, which we dislike, criticise, maybe hate. So what? Does that mean the makers have no right to showcase their talent or whatever you may choose to call it? It's by no means fair to stop someone from expressing what they want to, simply because you and I don't like it, isn't it? 

Ban, Really? ....

I particularly have a problem with the hypocrisy of those men, who dont hit the bed without a peek at the hot videos on their smartphones. And when it comes to raising their voice in public, would object to such content, to impress their girlfriends or the babe they probably have the hots for maybe?

And what good are we achieving, when the big bad world of Internet welcomes every single soul with open arms. And every kind of adult, horrific, negative piece of data is accessible to  all at the click of a button. You can delete the Roast of the Singhs and the Kapoors, but if I'm really upto it, I can watch Charlie Sheen or Justin Bieber being roasted, can't I? And what about the modern day movies like Gangs of Wasseypur, which have been applauded for their brutally honest depiction of the rural and criminal ways of life, including gory scenes and abusive language.

Mind you, I'm in no way suggesting I'm in favour of what the AIB guys and the Bollywood guys did. I don't even want to get into a debate on the quality of the content. All I'm saying is, India is a democratic country. Freedom of expression is one of the basic foundations of a democracy. And the more we are broadening our horizons as a country, the  more we need to let every voice be heard. Let every adult decide for himself what's right and wrong. We can make recommendations, give suggestions, set examples, but not dictate. That only causes revolt.

The creative souls should never be chained down. Let them lose. That's how you and I will build an open and mature society for our gennext.

Hey Baby!

As I sat sipping my tea while my little one was enjoying his afternoon siesta, I wondered what would be a good topic to debut with on my blog. Since my life for the last 2 years (add to that the months of pregnancy), have more or less revolved around little A, it was only natural that I thought of this.

To be more precise, the pressures of a modern day mother. And to be all the more specific, the pressure to get back into shape post delivery.  Whether you are a working woman who's gotten back to the desk after her maternity leave, or a woman who's taking care of the house and her child, this is something each one of us has been through. At times, it's the people around us who create the stress, at other times, it's we who put ourselves in that difficult spot.

Celebrity moms, who are constantly under media glare, take it upon themselves to lose their weight immediately after delivery, at any cost.